? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
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