Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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