How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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