Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
