Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
