I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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