I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
