chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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