My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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