you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
