You don't have asthma, your pregnant
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize