No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
