I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Randomize
