you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
it's like iHOP with fire
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Randomize
