This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
party gras won. party gras always wins.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
