Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
