Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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