I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
