So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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