I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize