Yo dont text me then not text me
People with herpes should wear stickers.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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