Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
