Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I am available for nakedness
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize