Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize