Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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