check it out our google latitudes are spooning
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
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