Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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