Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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