yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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