Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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