3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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