singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
