dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
