but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
