Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Randomize
