I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
