More tranny stories later!
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
