So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
