I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
