Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
