i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
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My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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