I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
