I want to stick my p in your. b.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
