i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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