the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
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