Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
