This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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