Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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