so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Randomize
