You're my little dorito
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize